I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize