I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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