id be glad to
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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