I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
There's even glitter on my cock...
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