Your tits are I can't wait for
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
