so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
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