I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i just google imaged poop.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Randomize
