Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
