how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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