Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize