there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
