Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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