my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
