we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
