Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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