I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
