Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize