Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
