Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Are we in a gay sports bar?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
