he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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