I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
