this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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