I can tuck mytits in my pants
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize