Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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