Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
