Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
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