You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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