I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Say something about gay babies.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
