So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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