You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Randomize
