Yo dont text me then not text me
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
