I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Randomize
