maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
