Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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