Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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