would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
The air was thick with penises
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Text me some of your sweat
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
