I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
