yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize