idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
