I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Let's get the cat blown out
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
