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called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
