we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize