Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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