barbara walters just said penis...
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
