You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
The Olympian is in my bed
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
