hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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