I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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