hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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