i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
