He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
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