Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize